Last night had to be a flop of a night, if i must say so myself! One end of the couch to the other end of the couch! HMMMMM bed you might say…do you not own a bed! Oh yes, yes indeed an expensive bed. I just couldnt lay in it….couldnt lay myself down, shut off my brain, and just go to bed. Believe me i said it to myself enough, beat myself up all day over it to. Three kids-9 months, 6 years, and 12!-they took advantage of the bags under my eyes, as well as my husband who played im sure ps3, while i was not sleeping(i feel asleep but wont admit). Things on my brain last night were of many.
-I have been told by a family member that things are not going as planned in my life because of my lack of belief in god. So that person bought me a bible and i have began reading it. Lets see, i didnt even get through the first book in the bible(because as it seems the bible doesnt have chapters, its books within a book). And god comes down after eve and adam ate the fruit. and god asks adam and even where they are
And god asks adam and eve–Where are you
This was the first question, my husband laying next to me, the baby two feet away, and the kids snuggled in there bed for the night. I laid down the bible..and wondered i believe i am not supposed to question God but i had to. It compelled me to know why would God ask that question, wouldnt he know. Was he scared that something happend to them. So i sat there weighing why he would ask that. And i asked that myself, have i ever asked the kids a question that i already new the answer to…and yes yes i have. like did you have the peanut butter out-seriously i dont think a man came in the house, took it out and left. Yes yes they had it out. I ask to see if they will tell the truth. But on the other hand, I ask the kids where they are if i don’t know or if we are playing hide and seek. But yet again, i asked my family member the question why he did that, well its not up to me to question God, and that he asked that question to point out a lesson to adam! I have a problem with that..I have problem with reading something and then just believing it and not questioning what the heck it is im reading! And because this is religious then every meaning has to be based by that. Let me say, why cant it be that god didn’t know where they were, and why does it have to be that i have to read a book and just believe in it, without questioning it! Without questioning the words that i am going to live by, breathe by and teach my children. SO of course, this led me on a hunt….Ahhh Ahh Google that shit! 🙂 And i came up with a number of things, Lets see.
Is a god an alien
-now im wondering if there is a god, then holy shit im going to hell! Im not sure what i believe in but i am sure when i find out..i will blogg it